Chasing the Walrus

Before I get too involved with today’s subject I wanted to address a few issues that arose out of my last post. HCB, hardcore blogger, tried to take a stab at retribution with his latest post. It was so lame, I’m not going to spend very much of my fucking precious time responding. As long as the dude thinks a chick is screaming with pleasure having her ass hole stretched out, he’s pretty much a lost cause. Feel free to drop by and let the dude know 12″ cocks that you can’t wrap your hand around is fake 9 out of 10 times. Even in the porn world.

The Porn Enchantress thinks I’m being fucking bitchy. Here I compliment her in the previous post and she thinks I’m bitchy. I’ll get back to that later as I fucking really don’t want to loose the train of thought I have for this post. As we all fucking know, my train gets derailed enough without any additional assistance.

Back to the topic at hand, chicks with an edge. Honestly, I’ve never really paid them much fucking attention but I happened to be doing a bit of channel surfing the other night and I ran across American Idol. Something about the punker chick on the show got my interest. It wasn’t that she was hot, in fact, I didn’t really even find her very attractive but still somehow I found her sexy.

Bad Wolf, one of my partners in crime here at the fucking cabal has been into goth / punk chicks for a long time. I kind of now see the attraction, especially since I got hot fucking pics like the one above from Crazy Babe.

I gotta fucking admit, I love the pussy tat…what let me fucking phrase that just a little fucking differently. I love the tattoo of the leopard this chick has just above her pussy. Although Tweety birds, I taught i taw a putty tat does come to mind. Anyway, this chick is hot and definitely has an edge about her. I think, know I absolutely am positive I’m in lust. I want to shove my cock down the throat of that little pussy cat.

Now to today’s babe of the post…Sunny Leone. Talk about fuckable!

Dude, you been reading my shit for awhile now. How about leaving a fucking comment and letting me fucking know how you feel about the shit I write or possibly Share Chasing The Walrus with Twitter

Tags: Porn Shit, Ramblings by
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So here I fucking sit, minding my own fucking business for once, perfectly happy going out on the interweb and finding shit of interest for myself. Not bothering a fucking sole and low and behold I find that everyone of the fucking cabal members, well ok not everyone but a handful of them, decided to take it personal that I noted that I had checked out all of their fucking blogs and found them boring.

Ana, babe, I know it’s been a long haul since you actually had something not fucking made of plastic between your thighs and your man did make it home just in time for the two of you to try to do the energizer bunny thing over easter but, as I’m sure you’ve found out, the one thing I know about all fucking dudes is that having gone as long as he did without a little pussy, meant his performance was not energizer bunny like. In fact, I’d put money on the fact that your still saying your prayers at night that he somehow finds his patience and can perform up to the standards he used to be for he has to return. So am I jealous that your getting some? Na, cause I know the truth, your only getting a little. Just like a good sprinter, stamina and endurance takes practice and your man, he’s way out of shape.

Porn Enchantress, why you gonna make me be so mean. It really, truly almost makes me think I should try to be sad being nasty to someone as pleasant and decent as you. I mean you remind me of the woman I used to fantasize about when I was just a youngen. Way before I knew about sex, drugs or rock and roll. The fantasy was always of the dream goddess bringing me warm chocolate chip cookies and a big glass of cold milk right before I went to bed. But boring, sorry I did include you in that.

Finally there is this hardcore blogging dude who thinks babes are boring. To each his fucking own, I always say but, seriously, you want to talk about fucking boring. That lame ass fake shit you call hardcore… well unless you like all the shit in your life to be fake how the fuck can you even get off on it. Seriously, you’ve got bitchs screaming with fake orgasms, homemade cum squirted from a fucking turkey baster and dudes wearing rubber cocks to make them fucking look bigger than life. Oh ya, that’s some real shit and it gets you off.

You perfer that fake ass shit over a sexy fucking woman who you can form a mental picture of and take on any kind of fantasy you desire. I guess I know what the problem is you have no fucking imagination. You can’t form those mental pictures so you convince yourself that all the fake shit your seeing is real. In fact, even the hardcore lesbo pictures you post have to have a fucking strap-on… thats right a fucking rubber cock. See the parallel yet or do I have to draw you a picture.

Physcologically, your simply not in touch with reality and that I do think I can prove. What kind of man needs to see a cock, even if it is a fucking rubber one, to get off? What kind of real man would post a fucking cute little birdie like this on his hardcore fucking porn website and meekly comment under it follow me. The only answer any intelligent human being could come up with… a ghey man in denial.

Which explains everyting. Why you need to see a cock in the porn you watch. Bet you even like the big juicey ones stuck up some chicks ass so deep she’s screaming. You simply hate women to the point you need to hear them scream and you love that fact that its a man with a big juicy cock doing it. You fixate on that large hunk of man meat.

Sorry dude, sometimes tough love is the only thing a friend can do to help another friend out. It’s tough for me to be this mean but I fucking just want to help out man. Get you onto the road of rightousness. See things the way they are. Become the person you were meant to be.

Ya’ll are priveledged, you just fucking witnessed the soft side of the Walrus. Don’t expect it to happen again. Oh, almost forgot, a sensative dude like me has got to twitter so ya’ll can follow me. Or be a punk and don’t

Now for a babe… hmmm I took the weekend off from doing any of my normal babe stuff. So, I turned to the only person, the only place where I knew I’d find a hot babe up to my standards, Flip and Nudes Planet

Dude, you been reading my shit for awhile now. How about leaving a fucking comment and letting me fucking know how you feel about the shit I write or possibly Share Chasing The Walrus with Twitter

Tags: Ramblings by Walrus
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Wow, it’s been a fucking while since I posted. Problem is I ain’t found shit lately worth posting about. There is some shit I could fucking try to sensationalize but the world is already fucked up enough without my pontification on the Ohio teacher who took 4 of the high school cheerleaders to a male strip club. As a respectable porn dude, I personally see nothing wrong with it but understanding the pressures of being a parent I’m not sure it’s acceptable behaviour. It’s the type of thing I can go all fucking day on back and forth so whats the fucking use.

So when I’m like this, the thing to do is visit some of my fellow bloggers and see what the fuck they’ve got going on. But shit they all bored the hell out of me as well. Maybe it’s just a mood or maybe I just have a very hard time locating those on a mental level that I can deal with or maybe, just maybe, I haven’t been spending enough time getting out and need to do so desperately. What ever the problem, a small joint should be the cure. But not tonight, I’m being good.

So, lets just skip to the babe. This babe comes from my newest creation The Blog Erotica post titled "Are You Serious". I just love the attitude she seems to display. Enjoy

Dude, you been reading my shit for awhile now. How about leaving a fucking comment and letting me fucking know how you feel about the shit I write or possibly Share Chasing The Walrus with Twitter

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So I stopped in at my favorite fucking watering hole this evening just to get mentally fucking prepared to properly present all the fucking wierd ass shit I’ve been runnig across on the internet lately.

Ladies, fucking explain this to me, what the fuck is up with wanting / needing to stand up to take a fucking piss? You now have a product… well ok you now have a fucking redesigned funnel to allow you to actually stand up to fucking pee. You even have your own fucking acronym for it a FUD or female urination device. It’s neat, it’s discreet and it hygenic? That’s what the fucking website claims. It fits easily in your purse, pocket or glove compartment.

Now lets fucking think about this, you can’t fucking wear it all the time or else you’ll look like a fucking dyke with a hard on. So it’s not that fucking discreet. Hygenic, oh ya, exactly what I want to fucking do is take something I piss in and stick it anywhere, whether that be a purse, pocket or glove compartment.

I understand that public "facilities” can be pretty fucking disgusting. As a dude, I’d never fucking take a shit in a public toilet so I do feel for you chicks who have to piss while in public but… do you really want to take a fucking funell out of your fucking purse, piss through it, wash it off so that everyone and their fucking mother knows what you just did and then put it back into your fucking purse.

Do you really want to, while out fucking communing with nature, pull this out of the glove box so you don’t have to squat, piss and then put it right back into the fucking glove box.

It’s fucking stupid, piss in something and then fucking carry it around with you.

The second stupid thing I ran across on my travels through the great web is going to take a bit of fucking explaining.

Seems this inter-city chick, still a fucking teen got herself knocked up. That by itself is a fucking big problem but add inter city teen, pregnancy and the fact the she is mentally unstable and you’ve got a recipe for a disaster that did in fact happen.

This fucking true story was related to the internet by an actual OB doc who has her own little blog, Dr. Amy the skeptical OB. So lets set the scene, pregnant intercity teen with mental problems (no fucking stretch of the imagination here) is able to hide her pregnancy for no one who cares for a little over 7 months at which time she goes to the emergency room because she’s fucking having stomach cramps.

This fucking inter-city teen is so fucking adept at hiding the fact that she’s pregnant that the probably over-worked nurse in the emergency room doesn’t notice and tells her to take a seat. The stomach cramps get much worse and the teen goes to the bathroom.

Next thing anyone knows is that there is blood coming out from under the fucking door to the ladies room. The brilliant staff, sensing something must be amiss, I mean it is fucking blood and blood usually indicates serious shit, calls security who breaks down the door (Ok, they use the master lock key and just fucking open the door) to find said mentally unstable ex-pregnant teen wrapping a new born child in a wonder bread plastic bag and trying to flush the child down the toilet.

Pretty fucked huh! Personally, I can’t blame the mentally fucking unstable teen. Why the fuck would she really fucking want to bring a child into the world to live the life she fucking knows. But anyway, I digress. So the chick tries to flush the kid and probably gets treatment.

The fucking child lives. With the help of some fucking fantastic doctors and nurser, the child makes it.

Now it becomes discharge time for the baby and can you fucking believe there is a discussion to re-unite the child with the mentally ill mother who tried to flush the kid into the river. Seriously, hospital staff is actually debating this. Luckily, at least temporarily for the wonderbread kid, our heroin, Dr. Amy steps in and brings some much fucking needed sanity to the fucking situation

Now there are many things in this story that are fucked but the most fucked is that the hospital staff would actually have to discuss whether to return said wonderbread kid to his mother, the one who tried to flush his ass to the river. Makes your fucking wonder where the fucking world is going.

Finally, if you’ve killed some asshole and your lying on your death bed (or so you think) dont do the confession. It won’t set your soul free. Seems some loser thought he was dying and having committed a murder and wanting to clear his conscience before heading to see the big dude, confessed to a murder over 30 years earlier.

Seems the dude thought some other swinging dick was trying to fuck his wife, so he shot the mother fucker. Being on what he thought was his death bed, he had the fucking police called in so he could confess. Unfortunately for him, the marvels of modern medicing saves his fucking life and the fucking cops hauled his ass to jail, for the rest of his life. Dumb ass!

Moral of the fucking story, if you fucking kill someone and feel a bit guilty, write it down in a letter, or your will, only to be revealed upon your actual death.

I was going to fucking introduce ya’ll to a bunch of the other caballers but, unfortunately for you (or maybe me) the two or three or ten Jack Daniels are catching up with me so I’ll cut the planned massacre short and only discuss one, Mistress Talia, the sadistic domme. I kind of feel bad, as she seems way to nice to be either sadistic or dominating. Probably the fucking worst thing anyone could say and I probably shouldn’t but it’s the way I feel and whatever I fucking feel always comes out of my fucking mouth.

Anyway, her blog… shit I just figured it out and feel so fucking stupid. Her blog has a post called “another present for the giantess fans” and I had assumed it was posted by her. I was all fucking set to blast her as the post briefly talks about being a giant and playing barbie but doesn’t go into any of the sexy details. But in re-reading I see that post wasn’t actually Mistress Talia. So, my mistress, I challenge you, giving the above scenario, what would a working sadistic domme do with her little barbie doll.

Tonight’s babe of the post comes from Nudes, Artistically Done

Dude, you been reading my shit for awhile now. How about leaving a fucking comment and letting me fucking know how you feel about the shit I write or possibly Share Chasing The Walrus with Twitter

Tags: Ramblings, Sex and The Walrus, Sports Commentary, Uncategorized by Walrus
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Displayed here is the back cover (it’s the only fucking picture I could get) of something I never in my life dreamed I would see. A simple cookbook with recipe’s, I fucking know thats not unusual all fucking cookbooks have recipe’s, but not where the main ingredient throughout the whole book is semen. Yes, that’s fucking correct, you read that right it’s book full of cum recipe’s. Below is the book’s description (taken right from the sales page)

Semen is not only nutritious, but it also has a wonderful texture and amazing cooking properties. Like fine wine and cheeses, the taste of semen is complex and dynamic. Semen is inexpensive to produce and is commonly available in many, if not most, homes and restaurants. Despite all of these positive qualities, semen remains neglected as a food. This book hopes to change that. Once you overcome any initial hesitation, you will be surprised to learn how wonderful semen is in the kitchen. Semen is an exciting ingredient that can give every dish you make an interesting twist. If you are a passionate cook and are not afraid to experiment with new ingredients - you will love this cook book!

I can hear the wife now: Honey could you have the boys over tonight for a circle jerk, I need enough cum to make some cream cheese cookies for the kids school tomorrow. If I have enough left, I’ll make the boys some almost white russians for their effort.

Or you go to a restaurant and the both of you order oysters on the half shell and the wife asks if she can have a doggie bag for the shells so she can make some man made oysters for the bridge club tomorrow.

I guess, as I guy, I wouldn’t mind too much as long as I knew which foods were cum filled and which weren’t. Seriously, would you mind if the wife / girlfriend was constantly trying to make you cum so she could get enough for the recipe she wanted to try.

So for those of you who want to run out and buy a copy, Natural Harvest - A Collection of Semen-Based Recipes. Bona Petite or how ever those fancy fuckers spell that.

All this talk about cum makes me feel it must be time to introduce you to the "ghey" boys in our newly formed cabal, Flip and Rofl. Both are English gents which typically makes them a bit eccentric but that could also be the "ghey"ness about them.

You’ve seen posts about me boy Flip here a few times. For being one of the "ghey" boys the dude definately has an eye for the babes. His blog for the cabal is Flips Flop House. He’s also going to be hosting a joint blog where all of us in the cabal will be posting in one central place.

I suspect that what will happen is we will end up mostly taking pot shots at each other (and usually I’m the one in the middle cause I’m different as if being "ghey" isn’t different). Not posting the link to the new blog yet, it simply isn’t ready but keep checking back, it will be someday.

The second of the "ghey" boys is Rofl. Since he is easily upset over the fact that people sometimes misspell or mispronounce his name and I suspect he may be mentally unstable, that is probably the only time you actually see me use it. But his claim to fame in the porn industry is big tits. It’s been said he can identify any pornstar by her tits. I’m not sure about that but he did prove on his blog that he’s not easily tricked. In the post, The thought I wouldn’t notice he shows his keen eye as he quickly identifies the fake boobies. Take a peak, see if you would have gotten it right

But I can gaurantee, anywhere you go on the ole intraweb (a Flip term…ya ghey) if you find one of them, the other won’t be far behind.

Today’s babe of the post comes from my site, Walrus Babes and a post called Home Alone. Meet Jana Jordan and one of the sexiest pussies I’ve seen in a long time.

Dude, you been reading my shit for awhile now. How about leaving a fucking comment and letting me fucking know how you feel about the shit I write or possibly Share Chasing The Walrus with Twitter

Tags: Ramblings by Walrus
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