Chasing the Walrus

After yesterday’s post, I actually got a little fucking curious about animal fucking and animal fuckers in general. I had always figured that it was all fucking fun and games type of shit, I never really figured sheepherder Bob kept himself warm at night in the hooves of his favorite sheep. How fucking naive I was. It does seem that some people get fucking excited by the swish of an animals tail. According to the old reliable, know anything you ever wanted to fucking know, Wiki, this is called zoophilia, the emotional and (optionally) sexual attraction of humans to animals. The human animal fuckers or fuckee’s are fucking known as zoophiles. It also seems that zoophilia has been around as long as man and beast.

This is a picture of a painting titled Leda and the Swan. Seems Leda and her fucking man swan must have been somewhat of the talk of the fucking town as even the most famous artists of the time painted their renditions of Leda and her loving fucking swan. This is a picture of a copy of the lost original painted by Leonardo, you know as in Leonardo Da Vinci. It seems that Michaelangelo also painted this fucking couple as well and fucking ironically his fucking painting was lost too. Not typically being a conspiracy theorist, one has to wonder if this is some form of early censorship. Especially when the study of Leda’s head, painted also by Leonardo, still exists as the horny fucking swan is left out.

But we have some fucking examples of animal love even in today’s society. Seems a few years back a man was dropped off at the hospital and later died. The police in investigating found that he had been visiting a farm of ill repute. Yep, you read that right, a fucking farm where you could pay the farmer to have sex with his animals. Seems the dude who fucking died had wanted to have a fucking horse ass fuck him. The horse was happy to oblige and literally ripped the guy a new asshole. Since, at the time, bestiality was legal in the state no charges were filed. But the police did find smaller, more helpless animals such as chickens, goats and sheep on the property and they are looking into whether animal cruelty — which is a crime — was committed by having sex with these smaller, weaker animals.

It also seems that there are zoophiles who are also into necrophilia. Yep, you read that right, fucking dead animals is a turn on for some sick fucks. It would seem some poor fucker was caught fucking a dead deer on the side of the road and is spending some jail time. Can you fucking imagine what this dumb fucker tells his cell mate when asked why he’s in prison? I saw this really sweet deer with the sexiest fucking tail, just lying there and I had to fuck her. Really, I didn’t know she was fucking dead at the time.

I also want to start a new feature here. Since my liberal use of the F-word and other such obscenities seems to offend a few people, I decided it must be time to offend a few more. With each post, at the end, I’m going to include a Walrus selected Nude for the post. Since this one was so fucking off the hook, I’m not sure that it would be considered an honor to be selected the first nude but I now present:

Valentina Vaughn - Nude for the Post

Valentina Vaughn | Around the Benz

This olive-skinned goddess isn’t really sure what she wants out of life. “I moved from Philadelphia to pursue a full-time career in modeling,” Valentina says. “Back there I worked as an exotic dancer, which was cool, but being nude in HUSTLER seems so much cooler.” So does that mean our latest centerfold has left her G-string behind? “Not necessarily,” she replies. “I still go to Vegas to dance on some weekends. Looking ahead, the brown-eyed beauty is open to opportunities. “I don’t know what I’ll do in the future,” Valentina murmurs. “Maybe continue nude modeling, maybe go back to dancing. The thing is, I’m really okay with not knowing.”

Click for this photo gallery

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Tags: Ramblings by Walrus
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As a fucking adult webmaster it can sometimes seem like the whole world is fucking against you. Especially since the good "ole" boy turned fucking religious reicht zealot and decided to increase the FBI’s role in tracking down us fucking porn slingers. At least right now I think I’m fucking immune since I don’t fucking make any of this shit, I just sell it.

For some unknown fucking reason, you the general public… or at least the religious side of the general fucking public, seem to think us porn slingers love to nothing else than take pictures of underage girls. That’s about as fucking far from the truth as you can get but I’m slipping off of the fucking topic at hand.

Now where the fuck was I. Anyway this post initial intent was to talk about an obscenity case and the judge presiding over it. The case is about some sick twisted fetish dude who is facing some obscenity charges right here in the porn capital of America. So you got to know that it’s some twisted shit and I do mean that literally as his fucking films feature bestiality and defecation. The dude is Ira Isaacs and if your fucking interested in the article, here is a link to the fucking LA Times article.

That’s the obscenity case. It’s the judge who makes it interesting. Alex Kozinski, the 9th Circuit chief judge had himself a little website and on this little website he had pictures of, among others (or so I’m told, the site was taken down before the URL was made public) a woman on her hands and knees painted like a cow. Now this begs the question…was she a fat heffer? Seriously, did they do this to a fucking BBW or did they pick a normal sized gal to play the part of the painted cow. I’ve got to admit…I’m not offended either way. Unlike the judge, I also don’t quite find the humor in it either.

He also, allegedly, had a video of "a half-dressed man cavorting with a sexually aroused farm animal". Now I’m no farmer, but then again neither is the reporter for the LA Times, but how do you tell if a farm animal is sexually aroused. I mean are we fucking talking about a dude giving a hand job to a horse or a bull. There are fucking legit reasons to do this. Was a fucking sheep sitting on a fence all made up and in a sexy little teddy?

In both cases without the fucking picture / video it’s pretty difficult to say if this is obscene or if it is just fucking funny and in that lies the problem in the obscenity case. See if it’s fucking funny then it’s covered under free speech and if it has absolutely no redeeming value it is considered obscene. Like the picture I described no someone may find that funny as fuck, personally I don’t but since I’m not offended by it I don’t consider it obscene. In fact, if anyone enjoys watching something doesn’t that something then have a redeeming value. I may not like it much as I can assure you that I don’t enjoy old Ira’s brand of porn but the fucking constitiution doesn’t say "freedom for the Walrus" it says "freedom for all" and as such if I were so inclined to watch sick fucking shit like a man fucking a sheep, I should fucking be allowed and if I want to film that and sell the film to others who enjoy watching a man get ass fucked by a pidgeon then I should fucking be allowed to do so.

I once saw a video of a chick giving a horse a blow job. I thought it was pretty fucking sick until the horse ejaculated with such strength that it threw the chick for about 5 feet. Then it became funny.

Damn did this fucking post lose it’s initial target. I do get lost sometimes in my ramblings.

Dude, you been reading my shit for awhile now. How about leaving a fucking comment and letting me fucking know how you feel about the shit I write or possibly Share Chasing The Walrus with Twitter

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and to the dumbass’s at democratic party who have once again nominated a fucking candidate who I don’t believe has a fucking snowballs chance in hell of getting elected. Seriously, how in the fuck could anyone in their right mind vote for this stupid fucker.

Change…every election probably since good old George…Washington, the opposition party wants to tout change. Fuck even George Bush ran on change during the 2000 election. But what the fuck has changed? As far as I can tell not fucking much. Oh the economy got worse but what else.

Issues, hmm lets see…Get out of Iraq. Great idea, lets go into an area, fuck it up and then walk away leaving it fucked up and likely to destabilize much of the Middle East. Who, by the way, hates our fucking guts. Pulling out the troops sounds nice but in reality it would be a major fucking mistake to make.

I’m not an Iraq war fan. Ole GW, as in GW Bush, lied to the world about Iraq for his own fucking personal reasons and in all honesty I don’t understand why the democrates haven’t had the balls to do the right fucking thing and impeach the bastard. Unless they really think Dick Cheney would be worse. Bush deserves to be impeached and no one is to blame for that not happening other than the democratic party. In my not so humble opinion, thats because they care more about having it an election issue than fucking doing the right thing for the country. Show the world that we don’t tolerate dumb ass shit like that. Oh hell no, lets fucking keep the lame duck around so we can use him as a punching bag during the election. Fuck putting the country first, lets put the party first.

That having been said, now that we are there, we have to finish what we started. Plain and simply. Otherwise, Iran, Al Quida (or however you pronounce that) will have won a moral victory. They chased the US out because we don’t have the stomach to actually fight a war.

Plus is this that much different than Korea, where we still have troops or Germany (remember world war II) where we still have troops.

Health care…Fucking bleeding hearts want government health care for all. When has the government ever not fucked things up. Look at Canada, it’s wonderful…ya if you don’t mind waiting lines and weeks before you can get in to see a doctor. What about the quality? It’s no where as good. But fuck everyone has it don’t they!

I could go on but I’ve got a life to go partake of. I’m sure I’ll be on this band wagon again. Oh and no I don’t support McCain. But perhaps he is the lesser of two evils.

Dude, you been reading my shit for awhile now. How about leaving a fucking comment and letting me fucking know how you feel about the shit I write or possibly Share Chasing The Walrus with Twitter

Tags: Political Commentary by Walrus
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